tlhIngan Hol Dajatlh’a’?
(Do you Speak Klingon?)
A notoriously hard language, Klingon is even difficult for the multilingual Uhura, but several companies have made it easier for us puny Earthlings.
Klingon is an actual language developed by linguist Marc Okrand in 1984 for the original Star Trek films. He based it off of various Native American and Southeast Asian languages. It is estimated that only 20 to 30 people in the world can speak it fluently– that must look awesome on a college application or job resume!
Sure, you can learn to speak Spanish, but what about when you want to carry on conversations that no one else can understand? Klingon, my nerdy friends. Also, it’s good to one-up the other geeks at comic cons. Who wouldn’t want to watch a battle of dozens (aka yo mama jokes) in Klingon? And the best part: the wildly successful Rosetta Stone has a package available for $270.
If you don’t have a CD-ROM drive, try the online Klingon Language Institute. You can check out the character pronunciations, learn Klingon spelling and even master simple phrases like “bIjatlh ‘e’ yImev!” (“Shut up!”) for free. They also have meetings and an email group. You can get all-access to the site for only $10 a year.
EuroTalk has a download for $40 that will teach you essential vocabulary. But we have to wonder if “essential” means conversational or war talk…
By learning Klingon online, you’re guaranteed to impress your friends and fall in love. #science